How To End Codependency In Our Relationships

By Ruthie Calderon


Your entire life has been inter-reliant. Your narcissistic and alcoholic parents have influenced this lifestyle. You have consequently engaged in numerous narcissistic relationships. You identify yourself with what you are to others and what you give them. This means your life is a codependency. In order for your personality to escape this rut, you have to take a number of steps. They will enable you look deep into yourself and reveal your authentic, beautiful and true self.

The first step would be creating a relationship with oneself. In the (Runaway Bride), the character Julia Roberts plays finally makes a decision. She would henceforth choose the eggs she liked rather than those her former partners preferred. A guy should take time to focus on their dislikes, likes and preferences. They should learn more about those things that make them happy or unhappy. They need to find healthy ways to cope and deal with those things that make them unhappy.

Of crucial import is establishment of personal boundaries. That way, you cease engaging in people pleasing. Forming your personal boundaries involves firmly saying no and drawing your line. An excellent example is firm refusal to do something you have no wish to. It does not matter if the person asking you to manipulates you by commenting negatively. Your relationships shall drastically improve the moment you beginning enforcing your boundaries in this manner.

It is vital that you listen and trust your intuition and feelings. You need to observe strictly, what are your exact feelings and thoughts. You have to remind yourself that you are allowed to arrive at your personal opinions and make your own judgements.

Honoring someones own intentions and needs is yet another important step. Most co-dependent people make decisions based upon what someone else wants and not for their own betterment. This creates a sense of fear before such an individual utters a word. Such a person must question their intention behind their words or actions. This lets them understand their individual motives and ideas rather than allowing other people define these for them. It assists them in developing self-respect and confidence making it easier to communicate their own needs to everyone else.

Another import concept is the creation of positive spaces. This comes with the realization of the difference that lies between taking responsibility for other peoples problems and supporting such people in their problems. With this realization comes the creation of our individual positive spaces. It identifies boundaries where other peoples space ends and ours begins.

Finally, you have to make a commitment to uplift your own self-confidence and esteem. Existing your co-dependent status will take time and steadfastness. The more you know who you are and what you want, the less people will upset you. A year may be spent making mistakes. Another discovering them and learning from them. A third involves practicing loving yourself. The fourth may involve accepting, awareness and solidification of your inner loving kindness.

In the end, people are responsible for their own happiness. What is created in themselves can later be skilfully imparted to others. In this vibrant and dynamic world, self-love makes us all stronger.




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