The tougher circumstances of life today has taken its toll on many marriages. The ups and downs of modern life, along with the high rate of unemployment, have put relationships under strain. If you are concerned for the longevity of your relationship, then something needs to be done as soon as possible. More and more people are finding that marriage counseling is helping to put the pieces back into place.
It is often the case that one person within the relationship has to make the suggestion to go and see a counselor. This needs to be bought up in the proper way so that the other partner agrees and does not feel threatened by the idea. If you are the one who has to do this, then most importantly ensure that you have good timing.
Sometime when you are alone is best, and when neither of you are overly stressed from work or other everyday problems. Do not attempt to discuss the possibility of outside assistance when you are in the middle of an argument. Your partner may then think that you are not serious about the idea, and are only trying to make threats. Try to explain that the purpose will be to solve problems between you, and to improve the quality of your relationship. Try not to make it seem like a punishment, or like your partner will be blamed in the process.
Sometimes one half of the partnership has to go to see a counselor by him or her self. This can still be beneficial, as the person attending can learn better ways to cope within an argument and to bring about some positive changes. Often, the other party sees the positive impact on the relationship and then agrees to start seeing the counselor as well.
If your partner has agreed to go along with the idea, then you are off to a good start. Although seeing a professional won't guarantee a perfect future, it will certainly not do any damage, and in the process you will learn some good communication skills and learn how to respect the emotions of another person. By writing down some of the goals you hope to achieve by seeing the professional, you can assist the process.
While you are noting your goals, make a few additional points as well. These will be the things that you feel need work. The types of things that you feel are a problem within your relationship. They can be brought forth to the counselor.
Although you are noting the negative aspects, start to work on the positive side of things as well. Write down everything you like about your partner and the relationship, and try to develop a more positive attitude. Both partners should make their own lists, and they can be shared.
Marriage counseling is not a quick-fix solution to a relationship, but it can provide couples with the necessary skills to start moving forward. It is also not just for couples on the verge of divorce, but for new couples who want to ensure the survival of their relationship. A counselor can help with a wide range of problems, including substance abuse and the death of a loved one.
It is often the case that one person within the relationship has to make the suggestion to go and see a counselor. This needs to be bought up in the proper way so that the other partner agrees and does not feel threatened by the idea. If you are the one who has to do this, then most importantly ensure that you have good timing.
Sometime when you are alone is best, and when neither of you are overly stressed from work or other everyday problems. Do not attempt to discuss the possibility of outside assistance when you are in the middle of an argument. Your partner may then think that you are not serious about the idea, and are only trying to make threats. Try to explain that the purpose will be to solve problems between you, and to improve the quality of your relationship. Try not to make it seem like a punishment, or like your partner will be blamed in the process.
Sometimes one half of the partnership has to go to see a counselor by him or her self. This can still be beneficial, as the person attending can learn better ways to cope within an argument and to bring about some positive changes. Often, the other party sees the positive impact on the relationship and then agrees to start seeing the counselor as well.
If your partner has agreed to go along with the idea, then you are off to a good start. Although seeing a professional won't guarantee a perfect future, it will certainly not do any damage, and in the process you will learn some good communication skills and learn how to respect the emotions of another person. By writing down some of the goals you hope to achieve by seeing the professional, you can assist the process.
While you are noting your goals, make a few additional points as well. These will be the things that you feel need work. The types of things that you feel are a problem within your relationship. They can be brought forth to the counselor.
Although you are noting the negative aspects, start to work on the positive side of things as well. Write down everything you like about your partner and the relationship, and try to develop a more positive attitude. Both partners should make their own lists, and they can be shared.
Marriage counseling is not a quick-fix solution to a relationship, but it can provide couples with the necessary skills to start moving forward. It is also not just for couples on the verge of divorce, but for new couples who want to ensure the survival of their relationship. A counselor can help with a wide range of problems, including substance abuse and the death of a loved one.
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